Silly Me

I read about the competitiveness and “mommy wars” before I had Eliana, but I always assumed it was exaggerated and I would never be one of those mothers. Alas, it is real and I am not immune. I was worse in the beginning without ever intending to be. I admit, I used to brag A LOT about Eliana and the things she could do. She was hitting milestones so early and what mother wouldn’t be thrilled about that and want to shout it from the rooftops? Or tell random strangers at the grocery store? Yeah, I suck.

The problem doesn’t really start with the bragging, or being proud of your kid. The problem really starts when the other parent hears “My kid can do this and since your can’t he/she must be behind.” Of course that’s not what’s said, but it gets turned around and heard that way. It’s almost impossible not to compare babies, especially when they’re close in age. I think every baby has their thing. Something they can do well and seem to pick up easily.

Eliana tends to be advanced physically. She rolled early, crawled early-ish, stood early. That’s her thing. These milestones tend to be viewed as a big deal in the parenting world (along with walking, I suppose). She’s not by any means better or smarter than any other babies (except in my eyes, of course). The milestones she hits “early” aren’t any more or less important than any other milestone. It’s just her thing.

Her thing is NOT food. It is a struggle every single day getting this child to eat. Bottles don’t seem to be a problem these days, but solids suck. I have to fight and bribe and plead and beg her to take even a few bites. Oh, sure, sometimes I’ll get lucky and she’ll eat a whole stage 2 container of something (sweet potatoes), but that is rare. Now that we’re up to 3 meals a day, I feel like all I do is stress about it. I try not to, I really do. But when you hear “my baby ate this and this and this today”, it’s hard not to compare. And this is by no means a jab at the person with the awesome eater, it’s just my PERSONAL issue with my own kid. I hear what isn’t really said.

Which is what other mothers heard when I would brag about Eliana’s things. That door swings both ways. Sucks when it hits you on the ass though.

So the eating is no fun. She’s good about trying new things, but then she loses interest. She used to like green beans. Now, notsomuch. Same with sweet peas. And half the other foods she’s tried. I keep offering them to her and she might eat a few bites, but GAH! Do you know how frustrating it is to hold a spoon in front of someone’s mouth that they WILL NOT OPEN? And you can’t even get mad about it because she’s a baby. She just knows she doesn’t want it.

I’ve been creative about ways to pry her mouth open. Like handing her a toy and when she opens her mouth to chew on it, sneak in the spoon. The first time I did that she looked at me like “touché”. But she’s smart and only fell for it twice. I’m quickly running out of ideas. I give her lots of different things to eat with different textures. I feed her, I let her feed herself. She’ll eat banana baby food and banana pieces out of the mesh feeder, but not broken into pieces on her tray. Sometimes she’ll take a piece off my finger and ONCE she put a piece in her own mouth. But it’s so hit-or-miss and she’s not at all consistent. Damn babies with their own minds and ideas.

And now you know what we’re dealing with. Your kid doesn’t crawl, mine doesn’t eat. It’s the same thing.

**You know who you are: I’m not talking about you in particular. I just used our conversations as examples. You know what I mean. Love love!